Question answered by Cindy Spake, Executive Associate to Mary Eisenhower, Director of Landmine Initiative at PTPI.
4. David once asked his grandmother if his grandfather’s habit of having company around the clock revealed a weakness or fear of being alone. In response, Mamie related that she wasn’t sure whether anyone had ever really known Dwight Eisenhower. Do you think this trait is a sign of weakness in a person and how much can you ever really know someone? Are there people close to you that you are continually surprised to learn things about?
I do not believe it is a sign of weakness to surround yourself with others nor does it necessarily represent a fear of being alone. Could it simply be a personal preference? Think of your upbringing. Were you an only child or one of many? While an only child may experience a more solitary childhood and as an adult relish time alone, a member of a large family may rarely have time alone. They may feel most comfortable surrounded by a constant buzz of activity. In Eisenhower’s case he grew up with siblings and pursued team activities throughout his life: football, the military, politics. Try to imagine the unyielding schedule that surrounded him at West Point, as Supreme Allied Commander and as President of the United States over the course of decades. Turning off that level of intensity when society deems you “retired” would be nothing short of remarkable.
As for really knowing someone, we can certainly know their day-to-day habits and interests, their beliefs and passions. Yet we may never know the depths of their joys and sorrows unless we have walked in their shoes. People are multi-dimensional. How can we expect to know everything about someone? I tend to categorize my life in terms of key events: the person I was as a child, after marriage, or following the loss of my mother. Even in professional versus personal settings, don’t people project different versions of themselves? Throughout our lives we share certain experiences with various people. Siblings share a common bond even as the first child’s experiences often differ from those of the third or fourth child. Schoolmates or colleagues share similar bonds, as well.
In Eisenhower’s case, the ravages of war and the subsequent toll such atrocities took on his health are really only fully known by those with firsthand experience. We can read about war, we can see images on television, but the bond felt by soldiers who serve together and by leaders whose every decision means life or death are specific to them. Some of our most profound experiences are shared only within the sphere of those who walked with us. Our journey is just that. Our journey. I believe we can know and love someone while allowing them to retain certain aspects of their journey to themselves.
People to People International’s Global Book Club is a way to connect with your global community. Global Book Club members communicate about valuable, international topics and gain unique insight and understanding of various cultural views in relation to those topics. For more information on People to People International, visit www.ptpi.org
The opinions expressed by PTPI staff and other book club members are entirely their own and are not necessarily the views of PTPI or its Officers, Board of Directors and Board of Trustees.
